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April 13, 2005
GNC - Congressional Hearing on Internet Policy
The Grantonian National Senate - April 13th Session
Convening for the purpose of determining the Imperial policy on internet presence and activity. First session.
Moi: This Senate is now in session! Please rise while we pledge allegiance to the flags.
*delegates rise and say the pledges of allegiance to the American and Texas flags, and then resume their seats around the hearing table*
Moi: The Senate Committee of Internet and Computer Policy now being assembled, let us commence the hearing. Mr. John, you have the floor.
John: Thank you sire. The purpose of this committee's hearing today is to determine the Empire's policy on internet presence and the different policies that will regulate this presence. First, we will review the history of our country's social internet presence.
The first email address possessed by the Empire was the student address assigned to the Emperor in early spring 2002, who was then enrolled in collegiate studies at the University of the State of Pennsylvania. This address was followed by one Yahoo email address soon afterward, as well as two Hotmail addresses. These addresses exist to this very day, in the governmental email array. The Empire now possesses over 10 different emails, which are all active.
The Emperor joined his first message board in mid-2002, the message board of the homeschool site Apricot Pie. After about a year of this site, he joined a long succession of boards in the Debate and Discussion series, hosted by an independent friend. These were followed in 2004 by two political simulations, a Christian teens board, and the message board of his gaming clan, the Brothers in Christ. There are three of four more that are either inactive, or abandoned, such as Peculiar People and another homeschool board. These message boards made up the bulk of the Empire's internet presence until mid to late 2004, when blogs begin to take over around 80% of the duties of the message boards.
The Emperor had a blog as early as November 2003, but this blog on Blogger, General Grant's Headquarters, didn't come up to full speed until early 2004. Soon it picked up momentum, and soon the Emperor established an Xanga blog and a brand new blog for his redesigned website, called the Texas Telegraph. The latest addition to the blogs of the Empire is a Live Journal which was commenced only last week.
Three Instant Messengers, also known as IMs, are currently employed by the Grantonion government. Yahoo Instant Messenger, AOL Instant Messenger, and MSN Instant Messenger. AOL is the preferred primary client used, followed by Yahoo and MSN, respectively.
In all, there are over 20 online and internet activities active in the Grantonian government.
The purpose of this hearing is to determine which activities no longer provide useful information or leisure to the government, and to construct a bill that will cut these useless programs and consolidate the popular and useful activities into an organized structure that will better serve the Grantonian government's purpose and time use.
I yield, Mr. Chairman.
All: Here, here, here!
Moi: The committee will take a recess to analyze the facts and information submitted, and will return to deliberate at a later date.
*recess lasts 30 minutes, then delegates file back in*
Moi: This committee will now begin deliberations and debate. Vice Chairman, you have the floor.
John: Thank you sire. Our first issue is email addresses. Although there a lot of email addresses, we have arrived at the consensus of opinion that all the ones no longer used for government functions and those that are idle can be used for "junk mail" emails - that is, they can be sued when emails are needed to download files or sign up for something with an email. It is therefore my opinion that we leave the emails as they are, with the three main personal ones intact; the personal private, the personal accounts, and the personal social ones. The others may be used for random purposes, with no concern for their integrity or spam.
All in favor of accepting the email draft to be drafted int othe bill as read, please say "aye".
All: Aye!
Jack: *nods*
John: All opposed like sign.
*silence*
John: Then we will move on to the blogs. This matter is pretty much open for discussion as are the message boards, so anyone may have the floor at this juncture.
Dmitri: The Texas Telegraph is the only blog that I see the necessity of keeping. All the rest have no function whatsoever. The Blogger blog is dead, and should be removed, while the Xanga one is failing every day. Who reads that one anymore? Bascially, if you can't think of anything to say that they aren't particularly inclined to comment on, you're blog is not only dead, you are a slave to your audience. I say that we keep Live Journal and this Texas Telegraph. I yield.
Gucci: You go too far Dmitri. Just because no one comments on the Xanga one doesn't mean it is useless. The message boards are dying every day, being replaced with blogs, and all the Empire's friends must keep in touch some way. If there is no way to keep in touch with your "cyber" friends, how do expect to keep them? We must persevere, because these links and associations are crucial, and we can't afford to lose them. Even if it's just a chance for them to read, and they NEVER comment, the option should still be there. I yield.
Robert: We must always be there for our friends. They have always been there for us.
Dmitri: Very well, I am willing to give Xanga one more chance. I predict however that most of your friends will move to Live Journal if you do. Half of them already are on Live Journal anyway. I'm not a big proponent of catering to everyone's fancy. I agree with Sarah Peterson, who has an excellent point on the subject. Allow me to read to you an excerpt from her "Treatise on the Futility of Blogs", which states: "I was also struggling in my mind with words to type here. A blog is not my sort of thing. Guess I am not able to keep up the running conversation with numerous people at once. You know... Carm likes to hear more about this, Tara can understand this other, and I'm not positive but Katie may want to hear from me solely for reassurance that someone out there is crazier than herself. Therefore I like to tell Carm more about this, Tara about the other, and give Katie her regular dose of nonsense. My blog simply cannot do that for all in one fell swoop (or "swell foop" as the case may be). By contrast, letters can. I love writing letters. They are so much more natural, have a much larger capacity. Plus, there isn't the chance of everyone in the world being able to see those. I can be comfortable writing whatever seems beautiful, touching, funny, or loony to us both. Without the blog barriers, which (silly perhaps?) badly bother me..........But in journaling online myself, I either write too much and still do not reach my point or I cannot write enough. Both always end up making me feel stilted. So, good-bye dear to the blog. And what ho! for sailing on the adventurous old sea of hand-written, mailmen delivered, envelope-ensconced letters...". I agree with Sarah. If your friends want to know what's going on with you, write them emails, and have them write emails back, or write letters for crying out loud! I yield.
Gucci: It's not just a matter of keeping in touch, it's a matter of keeping in touch in a way that keeps friends close and ever close in your mind. Blogs allow an extra window of fun and love to permeate online relations, without which I am confident the stagnation of friendships would result.
Robert: Here, here!
Dmitri: *slams fist on table* Very well, waste time and resources if you must, but get rid of the Blogger blog, which does nothing. Then you can have Live Journal and Xanga for your friends. I think it's useless, but we might as well give it some more time.
All: Agreed.
John: Then we scrap the Blogger blog, use the Texas Telegraph for creative, meditative, and oratorical fields, use the Xanga for personal news and events, and the LJ for artistic license and for the CSS minded in the blogging community. Agreed?
All: Aye!
Moi: This concludes the first session. This committee will take another recess and reconvene at a later date for the deliberation of the message boards and the instant messengers, as well as the drafting of the final bill. *bangs gavel*
*committee files out of the room*
Posted by Grant at April 13, 2005 10:38 AM
Comments
if they cut this blog, heads should roll!
Posted by: elly at April 13, 2005 11:37 AM
*Dmitri holds up Elly's post as evidence*
See? I told you that more people read this blog anyway. People who aren't even on Xanga or LJ!
Posted by: Grant at April 13, 2005 12:32 PM
Oh my. I had no idea that Moi and John and Dmitri and Gucci and Robert... that all those fellows would have a debate so similar to the secret meeting held with the Lord and myself. :)
Just a little note in case I wasn't clear enough: I didn't mean that all blogs are futile. Just mine for me. It was one of those bundles that needed to fall off and tumble down the hill behind me so that I could proceed towards the top. :(
I actually agree best with Gucci and Robert's points of view. They are good. :) I love other people's blogs, because they are truly an "extra window of fun and love."
Posted by: Sarah at April 13, 2005 12:42 PM
Of course, Dmitri knew what you meant. I didn't misunderstand your point of view, Dmitri just wanted to take the point you made and take it to his own level of intensity. He feels deeper about it than you had expressed in that particular post, so he just took it to make his point stronger. ;-)
Posted by: Grant at April 13, 2005 08:17 PM
All right. :D Just wasn't sure if I'd said what I meant. ;)
Posted by: Sarah at April 14, 2005 01:11 PM
Great Blog. Very creative. Keep it up.
Posted by: Tov at April 16, 2005 04:46 PM